Hello, and happy August!
So much has happened already this month.
On Friday, a team of burly moving men loaded up all of our worldly belongings—right down to the last mismatched sock behind the dryer.
I’d anticipated The Big Move for months, never quite believing we’d cross the finish line.
Yet here we are—decluttering done, our house of 21 years sold, everything packed, and a successful move across town to a smaller house that's closer to family.
But throughout the process, I’ve been hiding a secret.
The Truth Is…
I wanted to face this transition peacefully, with transcendent hope and abundant faith.
Instead, my brain worked overtime to think through every Worst Case Scenario about our move.
These doomsday possibilities would often haunt me in the middle of the night.
What if our house doesn’t sell?
What if we can’t find the right house to buy?
What if the bank transfer gets hacked and I lose all the money?
What if I accidentally pack the coffee maker in a box labeled “Holiday Decorations” and can’t find it until December?
The Right Teaching, at Just the Right Time
Fortunately, a bestselling book popped into my life last month with a whole chapter devoted to overcoming doomsday thinking.
The book is The Mountain is You: Transforming Self-Sabotage Into Self-Mastery.
Author Brianna West writes that preoccupying ourselves with Worst Case Scenarios is very common, and there’s a psychological reason our brains engage in this way.
“Worrying fulfills a deep need within us to feel as though we’ve conquered, and thus are protected and saved,” she writes.
In other words, imagining the worst feels productive—even when it’s most decidedly not.
The Antidote to Fretting
Do you ever obsess about the "what ifs" like I do? These are a few of the strategies Brianna West recommends:
- Shift our focus from what we fear to what we desire. In my case, "I hope for a smooth move." (Hey, wasn't that a laxative slogan?)
- Remind ourselves about other big challenges we've successfully navigated.
- Remember that emotions are temporary, and not always reflective of reality.
These are a few of my ways to cope:
Practice deep breathing - It's so simple, but taking deep breaths from the diaphragm sends more oxygen to the brain. It also stimulates the vagus nerve, part of the parasympathetic nervous system which is responsible for relaxation.
Pray - Instead of asking God for something to happen, author Wayne Dyer suggests praying about it as already accomplished, with gratitude.
Listen to your favorite tunes - The song Worry No More by Amos Lee never fails to help me feel calm.
How About You?
How do you deal with worrying and thinking about Worst Case Scenarios?
Drop me a note at elizagcross@gmail.com. I'd love to hear and share your stories.
I'll close with a photo of our new house, which is already starting to feel like home.
Enjoy these beautiful summer days of August,
